Chapter XXXIII —
EMPLOYING TRAVELING SALESMEN—DEPRESSION IN TRADE—HEAVILY IN DEBT—HOW
I PRESERVED MY CREDIT—I TAKE TO THE ROAD AGAIN—TRAVELING BY
TEAM—DECIDING A HORSE-TRADE—MY BOOK-KEEPER PROPOSES AN ASSIGNMENT—I
REJECT THE PROPOSITION—COLLECTING OLD DEBTS BY STRATAGEM.
While traveling in Northern Michigan I came across a young man clerking
in a dry-goods store in a small iron-mining town, who expressed a desire
to go on the road for me as traveling agent. His employer said:
“Oh, Bert is thoroughly honest and trustworthy, and naturally a capable
fellow; but I think he is rather too unsophisticated to act in that
capacity, as I don’t believe he has ever visited a town of over three
hundred inhabitants in his life.”
I replied that he was just the sort of chap I was looking for. I wanted
a man who would be[Pg 600] likely to listen to my advice and instructions, and
a man of wide experience would not be apt to do so.
I made arrangements with the young man to return to Chicago with me. His
manner at once convinced me that he meant business, and was determined
to succeed. But for all that, and with the most kindly feelings towards
him, I must admit that every move he made, after arriving in the city,
reminded me of myself on my first trip to New York. In fact, with the
exception of the difference in ages, he was a regular Joshua Whitcomb. I
felt almost obliged to lasso him to prevent him from following off band
wagons and chasing fire engines around town. He was particularly fond of
dime museums and the “knock-’em-down and drag-’em-out” Wild-western
plays; and I saw the necessity of getting him started on the road as
soon as possible, before he should become stage-struck. I had two
sample-cases made, and took him on the road with me through Michigan. I
took particular pains to impress upon his mind the necessity of
curtailing expenses, and often reminded him that the occasional saving
of ‘bus and carriage fares from the hotel to the depot, when he had
plenty[Pg 601] of time to walk, would be no disgrace to him or his House. I
also pointed out the foolishness of spending money with merchants in
treating, or in other words, attempting to bribe them by treating, as
that was something I had never yet done myself, and would not be
responsible for any such expense. I fully believed that the average
salesman lost as often as he gained by this practice. (I still believe
it.)
He was rather inclined to rebel against this, and said he was certain
that it would often become almost necessary to spend a little money in
that way in order to hold trade. I persisted that business should be
conducted on business principles only, and not socially or on the
strength of friendship; and it would only be necessary to call on a
merchant, introduce his business at the very earliest possible moment,
get through as soon as possible, and immediately take his departure; and
if he had any loafing to do, do it at the hotel; and above all, to spend
very little time in trying to become better acquainted. By these
methods, if he didn’t make a good impression he would be quite certain
not to make a bad one.
His penchant for telling funny stories made him known to those with
whom he came in [Pg 602]contact as “the man of infinite but unpointed jest,” so
as a matter of precaution I requested him to always defer telling
stories till his next trip.
I convinced him that all successful salesmen worked from early morning
till late at night, and that a dollar-a-day hotel, in a small country
town, would not be a disgraceful place to spend a Sunday. The result
was, he traveled the first year at a wonderfully light expense, and sold
more goods than the average high-salaried salesman.
He was not long, however, in becoming sophisticated, and was soon able
to roll up as nice an expense account as any of the boys.
The second year after I began business for myself who should call at my
office one day and apply for a position as traveling agent but my old
friend, Dr. Frank, who, it will be remembered, traveled through Ohio
with me selling the “Incomprehensible,” and whom I dubbed Doctor after
we set the old lady’s ankle. I had not heard from him for years, but he
had been in Michigan all the time since he left me; and in consequence
of having received a letter from me addressing him as Dr. Frank he had
been called Doctor by every one, and so concluded to become a physician,
and had spent one winter at[Pg 603] Ann Arbor, in the Medical College,
attending lectures. I hired him at once, and sent him on the road. I
also engaged five other men, later in the season, and sent each of them
out with a large stock of goods. They were all certain of an immense
holiday trade, and were extravagant in their demands for a large stock
to supply it.
I had been prompt in the payment of all bills, and had become quite well
acquainted with all the manufacturers. They called on me in large
numbers, urging me to buy, and wouldn’t take no for an answer. Each was
positive that I could not run another month without their special
styles, and as I could buy on long time and sell on short time I could
easily see my way out.
About two months before the holidays, the bottom fell completely out of
the fall trade. My agents began to complain, and each advised me not to
buy any more goods. They were too late, however, as I had bought goods
enough to supply a dozen agents. Their sales amounted to simply nothing.
A day or two before Christmas they began straggling in, one after
another, with their trunks and sample-cases full of goods.
My safe, and every nook and corner of my office, were all filled with
goods; and when my[Pg 604] bills became due I had nothing but goods. Two
weeks after the holidays I sent my men out again and kept them hus’ling.
Of course they were bound to sell more or less goods, but it was up-hill
work.
I gave my particular attention to satisfying Eastern creditors, and
managed to do so more by writing letters and acknowledging my
indebtedness, and promising fair dealing, than by making remittances. As
fast as any one of the last five agents I had hired would sell off his
goods I would order him in and discharge him. In this way I reduced my
stock without having to buy but few new goods, and very soon had but two
men on the road. These two were Dr. Frank and Bert, who were both good
men, and perfectly reliable.
On the seventeenth of January, this same year—1884—I was married to
Miss Anna H. Emmert, of Chicago, (my present wife), having long since
been legally separated from my first, and she already married again.
My second wife had received a thorough business education, although but
eighteen years of age, and immediately began taking an interest in the
management of my office affairs; and from[Pg 605] that time until the present
has been of incalculable help to me.
I had no knowledge whatever of book-keeping, while she was an expert;
and since my force of clerks, book-keepers and type-writers has run up
to between thirty and fifty, there has never been a time when she
couldn’t more than acceptably fill any of their positions; and during
our last holiday trade in our busiest season she took the place and kept
up the work of three different employees during their temporary absence.
And this in addition to a general oversight of the entire force, which
she makes her regular line of duty.
The summer following our marriage my wife’s health began failing. As I
had already become convinced that it was necessary that I should again
go on the road, I decided to buy a pair of horses and carriage and
travel with them, and let my wife accompany me. Our physician said
nothing could be more beneficial to her than such a campaign.
So after employing competent help to take charge of our office, we were
ready to start out. Soon after our decision to travel I traded a diamond
ring for a horse, harness and buggy, and[Pg 606] not being able to buy a mate
to the animal in Chicago at a satisfactory price, we shipped our stock
of goods and horse and buggy to Grand Haven, Michigan, by boat. I also
bought a double harness in Chicago and shipped with the rig, and we
crossed on the same boat.
On our arrival there I began searching for another horse, and succeeded
in finding one to suit me, which I bought in less than ten minutes after
the owner showed him to me. I then had a pole fitted to my carriage, and
by noon of that day we were under full sail for Northern Michigan.
DECIDING A HORSE TRADE.—PAGE 606
The first excitement I furnished my wife on that trip occurred about an
hour after our departure from Grand Haven, and, was in the shape of a
horse trade. We were traveling through a thick, heavy wood, when we met
a sewing-machine agent. I saw at once that he was driving an animal that
exactly matched the one we brought from Chicago.
I bantered him for a trade.
He stopped, and after looking over the horse I had just bought, said
he’d trade for seventy-five dollars.
“I’ll give you fifty dollars.”
He then offered to trade for sixty. I still offered fifty.
“Make it five dollars more, and it’s a trade,” said he.
“I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll wrestle you, run a foot-race, or spit
at a mark, to see whether I shall pay five dollars extra or not.”
He “sized me up” for a moment, and said he guessed he’d wrestle with me;
and asked me to name my hold. I proposed “rough-and-tumble.”
We then laid off our coats and took hold, and in much less time than it
takes to tell it my heels and hat were flying in the air, and a second
later I found myself sprawling in the middle of the road on my back.
After rising to his feet he was about to put his coat on, when I asked
if he was going to give up.
“Give up? Great Cæsar! didn’t I throw you fair and square?”
“Yes, you did that time; but the best three in five is what wins where I
came from.”
“All right, sir. Three in five goes, then.”
By this time we had gotten rested, and took hold again. I felt in my
bones that my five dollars was a goner, but determined to do my best,
and managed to make it pretty lively for him.[Pg 610] Finally, however, he
landed me again squarely on my back.
While taking a rest he remarked that “side-hold” was his favorite way to
wrestle.
I told him that I also preferred “side-hold.”
The fact was, I preferred almost anything for a change. I couldn’t see
that I was likely to lose much, at any rate, and was glad to accept
almost anything. A moment later my wife called time, and we took
“side-hold.”
For some unaccountable reason I felt more confident, and in less than
two seconds I had him on his back. I then began laughing and told him
I had only been fooling with him, and asked how he’d like to divide the
five dollars and call it a draw. He was extremely good-natured, and
seemed to enjoy the sport as much, if not more, than I did, but said he
wasn’t the “draw” kind; and if I expected to get any part, or the whole
of that five dollars I’d have to do some tall wrestling. I have often
thought since that the fellow must have known what he was talking about,
for when he took hold of me the fourth round, one would have thought he
was about to decide a bet of thousands of dollars.
I took in the situation at once, and the thought[Pg 611] uppermost in my mind
was to try to save my neck, regardless of the five dollars.
I was not mistaken when I thought I saw “blood in his eye,” for sure
enough he proved himself a terror, and in less time than any previous
round he again had my heels in the air and landed me on my back the
third time.
I acknowledged myself vanquished, and after paying him the fifty-five
dollars, we exchanged horses and separated on the best of terms.
A few moments later, after my wife and I had started on with our new
horse, I asked her how she liked traveling. She laughed heartily at the
absurdity of our plan for deciding the trade, and replied that with the
recreation, excitement and change of climate, she thought that I would
improve in health whether she did or not.
I soon discovered that my scheme of traveling by team was going to be
just the thing to help me sell off the large surplus of goods which I
still had on hand. I had always done the bulk of my business with
general-store merchants.
On this trip we learned that there was a general stagnation in trade,
and especially with this class of goods; and to undertake to push more
jewelry on those who then had more than they[Pg 612] needed and more than they
could pay for, would be foolish and unbusiness-like. I also found that
my agent who had been traveling through that section, had sold to
anybody and everybody, regardless of credit-standing, or responsibility.
I quickly decided to adopt a new system of operation.
On referring to my map and commercial book I found any number of what
are termed Cross-Road stores,—that is, merchants residing and doing
business off the railroads, and in very small towns where traveling
agents were not likely to stop. I could find any number of these right
on the lines of roads where my agents had been traveling, and where I
had considerable money due me, which I was anxious to collect.
I began at once by calling on this class of trade. Business was
exceedingly dull with all of them, and as I hardly ever found a single
one who had experimented with the sale of jewelry, I found but little
difficulty in convincing the majority that the only thing they lacked to
boom their trade was a stock of my goods. At any rate, I found my sales
running four or five times as high as any one of my agents had been
making. I managed to keep in range of the[Pg 613] larger towns where money was
due me from old customers, and would make it a point to call on them and
demand an immediate settlement of some kind. If they couldn’t pay cash,
I would take notes, which could be used as trade paper with my
creditors, by endorsing the same.
About this time I received a long confidential letter from my
book-keeper, saying he had been looking over the books carefully, and
found that I was owing twenty-six thousand dollars which was past due,
besides what was not yet due; and as there wasn’t a dollar in the bank,
and the majority of our customers were not prompt in the payment of
their bills, he couldn’t see how I ever expected to pull through; then
after apologizing for offering me advice, suggested that I return at
once, and make a clean breast of it by making an assignment; and after
settling up for from twenty-five to fifty cents on the dollar, I could
commence on a new and firmer basis.
I replied to this letter as soon as I could get hold of pen and paper. I
reminded him that I had never thus far received an unpleasant
communication from a single one of my creditors.
In other words, I had never yet received what might be considered a
dunning letter, but on the[Pg 614] contrary nearly every one of them had, in
one way or another, given me to understand that they had implicit
confidence in me, and were willing and glad to favor me all they could.
I also explained to him my new system of operating, and showed him how I
expected to sell goods and collect money too.
I then closed my letter by saying that in the future, if he entertained
an idea that I had got to fail in business, I wished he would kindly
keep it to himself, as there would be time enough for me to consider the
matter after my creditors had become dissatisfied; and added that as far
as I was personally concerned, I intended to stick to the wreck as long
as there was a hand-hold left; and that I’d pay one hundred cents on the
dollar if I had to collect my bills at the muzzle of a shot-gun. I then
cautioned him about keeping up my plan of letter-writing, and assured
him that at that particular stage of the game a good letter would often
take the place of a small check; and that I should depend upon him to
“hold them down,” while I would keep hus’ling and turn our stock into
cash, as well as to collect up closely; and with this system properly
manipulated there would very soon be a perceptible change.
In answer to this he said he was going to treat it as a personal
letter, and intended to keep it for future reference, in case he or any
of his friends should ever get in close quarters; he believed that as I
had now hit on a plan for unloading our large stock of goods, and with
my determination and bull-dog tenacity, he felt certain of success.
This was the last time I ever heard the word “assignment” used in
connection with my business, and I hope circumstances will never bring
it up again.
My wife and I continued on through the northern part of the lower
peninsula of Michigan, and I must say, that although my business affairs
were considerably muddled, I never made a more enjoyable trip than this.
After my separation with Flo. I had often declared that I would never
marry again; and I now saw where I might have made a serious mistake,
had I adhered to that declaration. With a wife full of hope, and a
determination to do all in her power for my comfort and happiness, and a
particular faculty for working hand in hand with me, I could see a
bright future, even in the darkest days of my financial trouble.
We continued to trade horses occasionally, or at least often enough to
break the monotony; and after we had been out a few weeks, I traded
jewelry for a handsome pair of ponies, harness and carriage. My wife’s
health improved rapidly; she found considerable amusement at first in
driving this team, following after me. Very often, when we would find it
convenient to do so, I would give her a case of goods and let her drive
to some distant store and make a sale while I would drive to another
town, and we would meet at still another point at night.
I agreed to give her ten per cent. on all the goods she could sell to
any new customer, and on all they would buy in the future. She made
several customers in this way, and as we are still selling them lots of
goods, they are known to our book-keepers as Anna’s customers, and she
never fails to call regularly for her commissions. When she became tired
of driving the ponies I traded them off.
We had some queer experiences that summer in making collections. One
firm had been owing me one hundred and twenty dollars for a long time,
and at last the entire establishment was turned over to the man’s wife
and the business[Pg 617] carried on in her name. This was at Farwell, Michigan.
We drove up in front of the store, and I went in to see what the chances
were for collecting.
I was informed by the wife that her husband was absent from the store. I
told her my name, and called her attention to the fact that she had in
her show-case a lot of jewelry my agent had sold her husband on credit.
She said that didn’t make any difference; she had bought him out, and
those goods were hers.
I then said:
“Madam, I am going to have you arrested.”
“What for?”
“For grand larceny.”
Her clerk laughed me in the face; but she changed color, and calling me
into the back room, said:
“Where did you ever know me before? Were you ever in Pittsburg?”
“Where did I know you? Were I ever in Pittsburg? Well, you’ll find out
where I knew you, and whether I was ever in Pittsburg, before you get
through with me. I’ll have you locked up inside of ten minutes if you
don’t settle with me,” saying which I started out.
She called me back, and in much agitation said:
“Now see here; there is not a soul in this town knows that I have ever
been married before, and if I have committed larceny by not getting a
divorce from my first husband, it will do you no good to have me
arrested, and will only make me lots of trouble.”
I saw that I had her cornered, and immediately took advantage of it, and
said:
“Madam, just think of it! a woman with two husbands! Don’t you know that
larceny is one of the worst offenses a person can be guilty of, in this
state? I am surprised that a woman of your intelligence should take the
desperate chance of committing larceny, and grand larceny at that.”
She asked what the difference was between larceny and grand larceny, in
a case. I replied:
“Grand larceny is a case where a woman leaves her first husband in one
state and marries her second in another without a divorce; and twenty
years in the penitentiary is a very common sentence for grand larceny in
Michigan.”
By this time she was trembling with fear, and said she would pay me in
full if I would agree[Pg 619] never to mention her name in connection with that
larceny affair.
I assured her that all I wanted was my pay, and I would never molest her
again.
She then returned to the store and paid me the cash. I had just given
her a receipt in full when her husband made his appearance and asked
what she was doing.
She replied that I was Johnston, the proprietor of the wholesale jewelry
house that he had been dealing with.
He turned to me and said:
“See here! I paid your agent for those goods when I bought them.”
“Did you? Well, your wife has been kind enough to pay for them again,
and I guess the receipt I just gave her is about the only one you can
produce.”
She then called her husband and myself to the adjoining room, and
quickly turning to him, said very excitedly:
“See here, John. This man knows me, and knows that I committed larceny,
and grand larceny at that, and was going to have me arres—”
“Larceny, did you say?” he interrupted, “what in —— have you been
stealin’?”
“Well, I hain’t stole nothin’, John; but you know I hain’t got no
divorce from Uriah,” she answered.
“Oh, divorce be ——! you infernal fool. That’s bigamy, you idiot; not
larceny.”
I then began to laugh, and said to him:
“Mr. ——, do you remember writing me a letter, once upon a time, telling
me to go to the devil for that account, and that it would be a cold day
when I got my pay; and I answered you, saying that I would some day
catch you napping and get even with you?”
His wife saw her mistake at once, and looked and acted silly enough.
He ripped and tore and swore, and threatened to throw me out; but I told
him he needn’t be to that trouble, as I was ready to leave, and would go
out alone.
The next hard case I had came up a few days later. We drove into Reed
City, and soon learned that our customer had sold out three days before.
We then went to the hotel, and after putting our team out I began a
search for my man, and was informed that he was carrying about two
thousand dollars around in his pocket, and had refused to pay any one.
There were any number[Pg 621] of creditors at the hotel, who had been trying to
collect, but were not successful.
I called on the man who had bought him out, and was assured that he had
paid him eighteen hundred dollars cash, and furthermore, that he carried
that money in his pocket.
Half an hour later I met the delinquent, and said:
“How are you, Mr. ——? Come into the hotel and take a cigar.”
He did so, and I said:
“It’s too bad you have had such poor success. What are you going to do
now?”
He looked very serious, and said he didn’t know.
I then invited him up to my room, where I was going to fix up some trays
of jewelry. He followed me, and as soon as we were inside I closed the
door, locked it, put the key in my pocket, threw off my hat and coat,
took out my watch, and holding it in my hand, said:
“Mr. ——, I’ll give you just two minutes by my watch to pay me
ninety-nine dollars, and if you don’t do so within that time I’ll not
promise that there will be a grease-spot left of you when I get through.
I want you to distinctly[Pg 622] understand that I am out on a collecting tour,
and I mean money or blood; so now, sir, take your choice: either settle
or the consequences; you have less than two minutes to decide in.”
He turned pale, and became much excited and declared he hadn’t a cent
with him.
“Then it’s your misfortune, sir. I’m going to ‘do you up’ or collect
ninety-nine dollars right now, whether you have a cent with you or not;
you deserve it anyhow.”
“Johnston, what can I do?” said he.
“Settle; settle, of course; and you now have but one minute to do it in,
and I’m not certain but it will be your last minute on earth if you
don’t.”
“Well, Johnston, suppose I settle with you, will you agree not to let my
other creditors know it?”
“No sir, I’ll not agree to anything of the kind; on the contrary, I
shall tell every one just how I brought you to terms, and you have but a
half minute left.”
He then produced a leather pocket-book filled with bills of large
denomination, and counted me out ten ten-dollar bills.
I thanked him, and told him I’d just keep the extra dollar for
interest, and then wrote him a receipt in full. He said he intended to
pay me, anyhow. I told him I intended he should, and asked how he liked
my system.
He looked foolish, and said he thought I’d come out winner, if I didn’t
get killed some day in trying to collect. He further said that he’d bet
I’d run across some one some day who would give me a good trouncing.
I told him I had it all figured out that I could afford to take one good
threshing for every five dead beats, provided I could collect from the
other four.
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